When you shut ego out, you give up the “me first” attitude, you give up
the what’s in it for me dance, competition and negotiations. In this world of “what about me”, humans tend
to feel they are compromising themselves if their thoughts and actions are
pointed in the opposite direction. We
are taught at a very tender age about survival of the fittest and only the
strong survive. While having this
attitude is beneficial, there are situations in life in which shutting out ego
is a dominant show of strength and survival.
For the past few years, I have been on a journey that caused me to
question my beliefs, intentions and perceptions that I had always believed to
be true. I remain on this journey
learning as I go and putting into practice what I have learned. Until that period of my life, I had always
thought that I had pretty much what I wanted and why wouldn’t I think so? The goals that I set for myself, I
attained. I have a strong, attentive
supportive family, a small intimate circle of good friends, and finally, I had
me and the knowledge of how to get what I wanted when I wanted it. Then the dam broke and the majority of what I
knew to be truth was no longer working.
My strength weakened and my new set of goals in life appeared unattainable. I could not help but wonder why this happening,
and what did I needed to change to turn it around?
This was when I began to learn about the two most powerful energies in
the universe, Love and Ego. I discovered that I was operating more in one type
of energy than the other, and it began to take its toll on my life. Ego, that nasty little debilitating road
block began to wreak havoc in my life, while love, in its truest form began to strengthen
me beyond measure. The other truth I
realized was that I was quick to preach love yet slow to operate in it.
Love says “give” - Ego says
“give to a certain point”
Love says “be happy for
everyone” – Ego says “what’s in it for me”?
Love says “be limitless in me –
Ego says “love as much as they love you”
I recently spent time with a dear friend who for all intent and
purposes had just gone through hell.
Loss of a loved one in death is no small matter; it leaves a hole in
your heart that at the time you feel like can never be filled. There are memories that are timeless in which
you can no longer share with the person.
There appears to be no relief to ease your broken heart and happiness
comes and goes. And the fact is that I
love my friend as they loved the person lost to death. Being invited to share their space so soon
after this occurrence was something that I had never experienced before. My friend is strong, committed, trustworthy
and loving. My friend is gentle, kind
and fearless…my friend is hurting.
Love says “bring comfort” – Ego
says “for how long”
Love says “be present in this
moment” – Ego says “what’s in store for the future”
Love says “be supportive” – Ego
says “why?”
It did not take me long to recognize ego, it’s always present; it is
part of our human imperfection. BUT LOVE
is always present and it is stronger and kicks ass! If I were to have been placed in this
experience prior to my journey, I would have missed out on the beauty of love
beyond measure. I would have missed the
beauty of putting someone else’s need in front of my own need. I could have possibly lost my friend. That is
the one thing that I would not have wanted.
What I know for sure is that all is well. I know that love conquers all and that when a
friend in need calls, you go and give whatever it is that they need. You feed them and whatever it is that spirit
requires of you to do, you do it with the purest of intentions. You set your feelings aside and shut out ego
because it is nothing but a selfless self-serving fear that never does anyone
any good. I am stronger for it, and I know
that my friend is to because they showed love and commitment in its highest
form .
So, my lovelies whenever you are called upon to love remember to: LOVE,
give, be limitless, comfort, be present
and supportive. The rest is
irrelevant.
Until next time my lovelies…Peace and blessings,
Phaedra
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