Who are You Serving?

A profound question indeed!  In this busy world and in a busy city like Atlanta, one can tend to get pre-occupied with their accomplishments.  Where WE want to be…what WE want to do…who WE want to witness our accomplishments.  And, while there is nothing wrong with reaching our goals and full potential, we also need to take the time to recognize that service to others is equally important.  It’s not only the right thing to do; it is necessary to do.

On a day like today, celebrating the Honorable Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., we are reminded of the great sacrifices he made while in “service”.   He served his family, his community and his country.  His service was so great that he gave his life so that we all could live a better tomorrow.  But for him, service did not start with the Civil Rights Movement.  As a man of God, he knew the importance of service and followed in a Christ-like way.

Shouldn’t we who profess to have a Christ-like mind do the same today, tomorrow and every day?  I’m just saying, because I to have found myself asking today… Who Am I Serving?

Love to you all, and…

Peace and blessings,
Phaedra


 

Watching it Grow

I had the honor of spending time with my granddaughter Ariah this weekend.  I noticed that I am discovering so much more about her.  Her likes, her dislikes, her personality, her flare and style, and even at age 5, the way that she processes information.  I am literally “watching her grow”. 

It’s funny, because I am at the stage in my life where I am aware of what I am doing.  Let me explain.  It’s not like I’ve never seen anyone grow before, I have a daughter who is grown. Looking back I was tasked with other responsibilities, like provision, education, protection etc., and even though I can remember the moment of her conception, and the exact moments leading up to her birth, and celebrated the milestones in her life, I concentrated on her future wanting it to be better and brighter, and perhaps did not give her present the full attention it deserved.  As parents we tend to do that. 

There are many events in our lives in which we fail to take full advantage of watching it grow like: careers, personal growth, educational pursuits, businesses, children and even love.  One reason may be that in our mind, its completion, or the final destination is better than where we are right now.  Take the entrepreneur for example; everyone knows that the startup of a business is a very trying time.  Obtaining funding and investors for the startup determines when and how your business gets on its feet.  The entrepreneur dreams of the day when their business and the profits from this business is exactly how he or she visualized it…profitable.  When success has been achieved, the entrepreneur then begins to look back over their business career recounting what it took to get there, but can never really say that they appreciated going through all this until they have reached the end, or what they consider successful.  During its lean times, the business owner may often have thoughts of giving up, but they don’t because their sight is fixed on its completion, its success.  I wonder how many entrepreneurs stop and say, “This is where I am at this moment, I am thankful for it”, and begin to move on. 

When we take the time to “watch it grow” , whether it be family, careers, business, or personal growth, there will be times when we stop to take full advantage of life’s moments.  We take notice of the sights and sounds of where we are at that moment, who is involved, what’s changed or what is changing, what lessons have been learned thus far.  More often than not, we look back when our task or dream has manifested, or we only begin to notice when there is a “bump” in the road or some type of issue.  This can be problematic in that we have to stop, fix the issue, then get back on track when if we only took some time in between to “watch it grow” and savor what we had at that moment.

But that’s why god gives us second chances by means of grandchildren, new business ventures, new loves and most of all a brighter outlook on life.  With this opportunity not only can we stop and savor the here and now, we can enjoy what is already grown, like watching my daughter “grow “as she raises her family. So I say, stop, savor, and take the time to watch it, your growth right now.

Peace and blessings,

Phaedra


 

Looking Back with Eyes Wide Open

In a moment of weakness have you ever looked back on your life and felt like you had more back then than you do now?  Many times I’ve heard friends reminisce about their past “glory” days.  And while noone cannot deny that life back in the day may have been good, and perhaps even prosperous, but considering everything… mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, how good was good?

I looked  back 10 years to 2004, and compared where I was then to where I am now.  It made me extremely thankful about the progress that I made and how much good has happened in my life.

 In 2004 I…

Hardly knew anyone in Atlanta

Worked as a Licensing Coordinator
Made my daughter my #1 priority
Ended a not-so-good personal relationship
In school for my graduate degree  
Has no sense of spirituality
Thought that all my accomplishments this far was by my own doing
Looking for love in all the WRONG places
Goal…step…goal…step orientated
Never considered what my purpose in life was
Communication …what’s that?

 In 2014 I…

Am blessed to be a part of so many wonderful peoples’ lives and made lasting friendships/family

Am blessed to be a Functional Analyst for a major Fortune 500 company
Am blessed that I make myself the #1 priority, with more than enough room for still loving my child
Am blessed that I can appreciate the ending of a personal relationship and the beginning of the right one
Am blessed to be an MBA graduate
Am blessed to have a personal relationship with Jehovah Almighty
Am blessed to know that if it were not for Jehovah, none of this would have happened
Am blessed because I no longer look for love, but know that love is all around me and in me
Am blessed not to be so rigid in obtaining my goals, I now relax, flow into what is for me
Am blessed to know what my purpose in life is
Am blessed to be able to build on my communications skills which aids in the betterment of self

It’s a good exercise to do because it makes you thankful and grateful beyond measure.  With this exercise you can see how far you’ve come and but you can also see where you need to go.  It doesn’t have to be a look back of 10 years it can be any amount of time you want.  If you are holding steady on the things that enrich your life…good, if you are holding steady on the not-so-good things in your life, make a note and get to changing. 

 So the next time when someone talks about the good ole’ days remember where you are now…at this moment.  Remember that even though you may have excelled in a few areas of your life back then, chances are you are excelling even more now.

Peace and blessings,

Phaedra


 

Why Wait Until January 1st…Change Now!

When heading into a new year many people often think about change.  But the funny thing about it is that their start date is always in the future.  Come ‘on we’ve all said it…”on January 1^st, I’m going to start_______”.  I am even guilty of it. 

For instance, I need to drink more water.  The proper amount of water is good for your body, it washes away toxins in your system, it’s good for your skin and nails, and it’s a good habit to have.  The other day, I caught myself saying “starting January 1^st, I’m going to drink at least 8 glasses of water a day!”  How stupid is that?  Between the time I made that statement and January 1^st, I could have been hospitalized for dehydration!  Why wait to make this change then, when I can do it now?  Speaking from my point of view, here is why we put off to the future what we can change today.

Just One More…
It seems like when we put change off it is because we want the opportunity to savor the last of it.  Just one more…bite…drink…smoke.  Have you even noticed that when the day comes for you to stop, you make a big deal about it?  You announce to yourself or the group that this is the last time you will be doing this, and you usually mark the occasion by overindulging.  Little do you know it makes you want to do it again.

We Don’t Really Want to Stop Right Now

Being pressured into change is not the way to go about changing.  You have to desire it, you have to want it, and you have to be dedicated to it. Although it is always nice to have a support system behind you, remember that only you are accountable for your actions.  Change because someone wants you to change is really a lie, and eventually, you go back the same old bad habit(s) you had before.  This can cause stress and frustration to all parties involved when unsuccessful.  Make sure that your motives are right, in that way, when you have a setback, you will also have the same desire and dedication to push through it.

Change is Difficult

Now really, who wants to do something that is difficult?  No one volunteers for that.  The old saying “nothing good in life comes easy” is true, but when tasked with a difficult change, your Mindset is key.  Change your mindset…change your life.  Yeah, the task may be difficult, but it is not too difficult for you to master.  As William Earnest Henley said in his poem Invictus – I am the master of my fate, the captain of my soul.  You can do it!

You Don’t Know Where to Start

Depending on what you want to change, there are all types of help available.  The internet is a great place to start for it contains broad topics relating to medical, physiological, emotional, physical and even spiritual research on a subject.  Should you want to narrow your search to include physicians and support groups’ in your area, the internet is a valuable source to consult.  Also, I would like to add that consulting your physician before starting the process would be highly recommended.

If, at the beginning of this year you desire to change something in your life, then good for you.  Examine your motives for the change, realizing that change takes time, and that change is a gradual process. Dedicate yourself to becoming a better person because of it instead of focusing on the process.  In time you will reach the goal you have set out to accomplish.  Happy New Year to all and above all else…

Peace and blessings

Phaedra