Shutting Ego Out

When you shut ego out, you give up the “me first” attitude, you give up the what’s in it for me dance, competition and negotiations.  In this world of “what about me”, humans tend to feel they are compromising themselves if their thoughts and actions are pointed in the opposite direction.  We are taught at a very tender age about survival of the fittest and only the strong survive.  While having this attitude is beneficial, there are situations in life in which shutting out ego is a dominant show of strength and survival.

For the past few years, I have been on a journey that caused me to question my beliefs, intentions and perceptions that I had always believed to be true.  I remain on this journey learning as I go and putting into practice what I have learned.  Until that period of my life, I had always thought that I had pretty much what I wanted and why wouldn’t I think so?  The goals that I set for myself, I attained.  I have a strong, attentive supportive family, a small intimate circle of good friends, and finally, I had me and the knowledge of how to get what I wanted when I wanted it.  Then the dam broke and the majority of what I knew to be truth was no longer working.  My strength weakened and my new set of goals in life appeared unattainable.  I could not help but wonder why this happening, and what did I needed to change to turn it around?

This was when I began to learn about the two most powerful energies in the universe, Love and Ego. I discovered that I was operating more in one type of energy than the other, and it began to take its toll on my life.  Ego, that nasty little debilitating road block began to wreak havoc in my life, while love, in its truest form began to strengthen me beyond measure.  The other truth I realized was that I was quick to preach love yet slow to operate in it. 

 Love says “give” - Ego says “give to a certain point”

Love says “be happy for everyone” – Ego says “what’s in it for me”?

Love says “be limitless in me – Ego says “love as much as they love you”

I recently spent time with a dear friend who for all intent and purposes had just gone through hell.  Loss of a loved one in death is no small matter; it leaves a hole in your heart that at the time you feel like can never be filled.  There are memories that are timeless in which you can no longer share with the person.  There appears to be no relief to ease your broken heart and happiness comes and goes.  And the fact is that I love my friend as they loved the person lost to death.  Being invited to share their space so soon after this occurrence was something that I had never experienced before.  My friend is strong, committed, trustworthy and loving.  My friend is gentle, kind and fearless…my friend is hurting.

 Love says “bring comfort” – Ego says “for how long”

Love says “be present in this moment” – Ego says “what’s in store for the future”

Love says “be supportive” – Ego says “why?”

It did not take me long to recognize ego, it’s always present; it is part of our human imperfection.  BUT LOVE is always present and it is stronger and kicks ass!  If I were to have been placed in this experience prior to my journey, I would have missed out on the beauty of love beyond measure.  I would have missed the beauty of putting someone else’s need in front of my own need.  I could have possibly lost my friend. That is the one thing that I would not have wanted.  What I know for sure is that all is well.  I know that love conquers all and that when a friend in need calls, you go and give whatever it is that they need.  You feed them and whatever it is that spirit requires of you to do, you do it with the purest of intentions.  You set your feelings aside and shut out ego because it is nothing but a selfless self-serving fear that never does anyone any good.  I am stronger for it, and I know that my friend is to because they showed love and commitment in its highest form .

So, my lovelies whenever you are called upon to love remember to:  LOVE, give, be limitless, comfort, be present and supportive.  The rest is irrelevant. 

Until next time my lovelies…Peace and blessings,

Phaedra