Step-by-Step

As the clock on 2014 wound down, 10…9…8…I gathered my thoughts as to how my 2015 would start and eventually end.  I thought about the most important states of my life, mental, physical, spiritual and financial…7…6…5.  Trying to wrap my mind around this list of envisioned accomplishments placed on a piece of paper that were as long as my arm.  For me, it seemed torturous to look at…4…3….  Then all of a sudden, I took the list in hand and tore it up…2…1…Happy New Year! 

What was I writing these things down for?  For one, it’s what I had done in the past, every year since I could remember.  Did it work, not really.  Every successful person that I know say that you must have a written plan for your life and I believe that.  But what I realized was that instead of following through with my life plan, I restarted it every year and by doing that no real connections were being made.  I had a plan and I needed to stick to it!  My wants, needs and desires were the same and what I needed to change when the time came was the method of implementation and follow through of my life plan. 

So here I am in month three of the New Year recognizing that progress is here because I decided to just live without a list!

The first thing I did was to acknowledge that my life on earth was not a mistake, and that I am here because I am supposed to be here.  I have absolutely no doubt about that.  The second thing is the acknowledgement that my life plan is and will forever be a step-by-step process and that my steps must be ordered properly and that each day I am getting closer to my purpose.  I started with getting my core state of mind in alignment.  

State of Mind #1 - Finances

You can buy the house or car, but if you mismanage your funds, your financial mind will forever be in turmoil.  Moderation is key and the word “no”, well that is even better.  Like my mother always says “there are more important things in life than having lots of money” but understanding the science of handling money properly, makes the more important things more enjoyable.

State of Mind #2 – Physical

When people think of the word “baggage”, they think in terms of an emotional state.  Me, I think about the word “baggage in a physical way.  It was physically draining for me to carry around the extra weight that I had been carrying around for years so I made a decision to get rid of it.  I also made the decision to keep it off, and just as in any step-by-step process, moderation is key and the word “no”, well that’s even better.  Changing the way you think about food will not lead to a dull life as most “foodies” might argue.  It’s how much you consume and where you place food on your list of priorities is what you really need to focus on.  Exercise is equally important.  A high caloric intake of food cannot be off-set in the beginning.  Do the work, loose the weight, and then research to see where the method of implementation and follow through could possibly be adjusted a little bit.

An unhealthy habit is another struggle.  What is easy to pick up, is not so easy to put down.  It takes time, and you will try over and over again.  But keep going eventually you will get there.

State of Mind #3 – Mental

This state covers a broad area.  So many things can affect a person mentally.  Everything  from relationships, physical, financial and spiritual.  The first thing that has to be done is to “get out of your own head”.  Improper thoughts harm you.  What you think you see or hear, is very often not the case.  In reality, what you may be thinking in your head causes you to act or react in a certain way, which in turn brings on the negative result.  The key here is to get to a point in your being that you can make the distinction between fact and fiction.  Normally, I go with my gut or “intuition” that rarely fails me.  When my “gut” tells me not to go, I don’t go, not to call, I don’t call and to speak, then I speak.  Intuition is not emotion, I leave that at the door and for women, that is hard but not impossible to put into practice.

Secondly, you have to value yourself and know your worth.  So many bad decisions are made because we fail to realize that just because it is in front of us, we don’t have to take it.  Have little to no self-worth leaves you open prey and when it’s all over, you suffer the consequences.

State of Mind#4 – Spiritual

Recently, I asked a person who I cared deeply for what their belief system was.  Instead of telling what they believed, they began to tell me all the things that they did not believe in.  For a person like me, that was confusing because I know what I believe in.  I believe in love, god, family, communication and the power of one.  I asked because for me it would have provided me with a sense of commonality.  I believe that they knew what they believed in and that the divide would be too big.  But there is really no divide, just a difference.  I firmly agree that people don’t have to believe the same in all things, but I know for me a belief in something is important.  So no matter what you believe, be able to express it, work on it daily and build on it.  For it is what we believe in that makes us even stronger.

Now I am able to say that my life plan without a list is truly a journey.  The road map of life is filled with the proverbial twists and turns, most of which I have seen in a different way before.  I trust in what I know and in what and who I believe in and I just LIVE!

Until next time my lovelies…

Peace and blessings,

Phaedra